Architect: Boy, wait 'til you see these designs I have for you! You're going to love all of the secret puzzle doors!
Client: Secret puzzle doors?
Architect: Yes! Like check this one out! You have to turn these statues to face the right way in order to open the door to the room leading to the monastery crypt. Isn't that cool?
Client: Why would you do that?
Architect: Why?
Client: Well, yes. On your blueprint here there are stairs down to there from the main sanctuary. Why would you use this puzzle door entrance?
Architect: ...
Architect: ...or how about this! A secret treasure library above the chapel!
Client: Ok, and how do we get into this one?
Architect: Two giant gold keys high up on the wall. You have to climb up to them and hang from them to open the door.
Client: That would make it not much of a secret, wouldn't it?
Architect: Eh?
Client: Well apart from them being giant keys, having monks climbing around the walls and hanging from keys whenever you wanted to visit the library is going to be a bit noticeable I would think.
Architect: Oh, that's ok. We're just calling it a library. There won't actually be anything up there other than windows to look out at the treasure building which will be next door. You'll be able to tell because it will have a giant secret treasure symbol on the roof.
Client: And that's where we put the treasure?
Architect: Naw, we'll hide the actual treasure in a scret room under the church altar.
Client: And how will we open that? Secret staute levers? Twisting symbols? A mosaic puzzle?
Architect: Naw, just shove the altar out of the way. We were overbudget.
Client: Remind me again why I hired you?
Architect: I am very cheap. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go add in three foot high walls everywhere.
Babo Monkey. Various and infrequent musings about games new and old.
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